Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Sale, Sale, Sale

Today I have been prepping for the old poor white trash ritual of getting rid of my poor white trash, or as many know it, the garage sale.

It is a tradition that I am not a fan of, but I also don't like clutter and could use a little extra cash... two birds... what the hell! I have spent the last 7 hours in a dirty garage where the temperature was 105 degrees while unloading tons of dusty boxes. I have broken 2 nails and I smell pretty ripe.

We moved into this house just under three years ago and there are still about 30 boxes that we never unpacked, never missed, and thus must get rid of. We also have bought new furniture and shoved the old stuff into the basement. Not to mention the toys that my kids haven't played with for 3 years (at least) that I will be sneaking into the sale. Saturday morning, they will rediscover these toys in the sale. They'll beg me not to sell them and whine but that is my favorite!

I will work my fingers to the bone for three days, sweat like a pig, wake up at 5:30AM on Saturday (because even though the ad clearly states 7AM- they will, without fail, arrive BY 6AM!), barter with the hip pack and visor wearing freaks that don't want to pay $1 for a $40 toy, sell a $300 coffee table for $4 and completely diminsh any worth that my items ever had. I can't wait!

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Honeybell said...

Ha! We have to relocate the children when we have yard sales. Otherwise they stand outside looking mournful as we sell their toys. They tell the sellers "that's my favorite toy", then the people refuse to buy it. They probably leave to report me to Child Protective Services.

Jill said...

I HEART garage sales. Well, not really, but I like the money we make afterwards.

We do a major garage sale twice a year with my girls' preschool. Families donate the crap they want to sell, knowing full well that all money will go towards the kids.

We bought 5 different colored stickers - each sticker had set price to it (blue was 25 cents, red $1, green $2, and so on...) and labeled everything with them... We made a whopping $2000.

And yes, everyone showed up about 30 min. before we opened! Good luck!

The Mom said...

Not envying you at all, but truly good luck. Around our parts everyone wants something for nothing so I get a bigger kick out of donating everything to goodwill and saving myself the pain.

C said...

I hate having yard sales too (although I love getting rid of crap!) We've had a couple of our own before various moves we've made.

You cracked me up about the customers getting there early and haggling over prices--so true! Those yard saler types mean BUSINESS!

Deb said...

How great is it to get rid of stuff? It will be worth the hassle. Just tell the kids that if they want the toy so much, that you will sell them with the toy. :) Obviously, I'm just kidding.

Sue said...

Gotta love the garage sale. Except when it's at your neighbors and your kids come home with their old stuffed animals.

Tiffany said...

HAHA That makes me think of my son and how we try to beg him to give away some of his toys that he doesn't play with. Smart move on your part not letting them see their old toys. Good luck!!

Dawn@Embracing the Ordinary Life said...

I soooo feel your pain. I gave up garage sales years everything goes to goodwill. I do however LOVE to shop them...occationally.

Aubrey said...

I came across your blog at Cheaper Than Therapy. You are SO funny. You say all the things I wish I could (and always think!).
We just had our annual neighborhood garage sale. I feel your pain!

Anonymous said...

Good luck, sounds like fun in a sadistic kind of way! Sell the toys back to your kids - that way if they want to take up more room at least they can pay for it!

Ann said...

Good luck!
I thing I'm doing this in a couple of weeks. (Although, after reading your post... I really don't know why?...)

Sully Sullivan said...

What gets me is opening a box I've had stored away for 3 years and convincing myself to keep some of those forgotten items in the EXACT same way that compelled me to pack them and take them with me in the first place.

DO NOT lie and say you didn't come across at least one item and talk yourself into keeping it...packed away...for at least 3 more years.