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12:00 midnight, my 13 year old son is standing next to me... Are you shitting me? Why are you awake? (I was startled, I censor around my kids on good days, this was not one of those days).
I threw up, he says. Oh, OK, well do you feel better, now? Get back to bed. No, I didn't make it to the bathroom.Are you shitting me? You're 13!
Go upstairs, see icky icky icky, smell icky icky icky all over his floor, bedding, dust ruffle. Are you shitting me?
Must dismantle his bed- very heavy mattress and box spring to remove vomity bedding. Lift box spring to expose a world of horror. Failing school assignments, tons of candy wrappers and empty soda cans, the long lost "cup" that I painstakingly purchased for him, about 200 Mardis Gras beads(? maybe I don't want to know?), and 23 socks!!! Are you shitting me?
Resolve and vacuum the chunks off the floor and remake bed with clean linens. I get downstairs to see the last 30 seconds of Kathy Griffin on Jimmy Kimmel (my much anticipated event for the night!) Are you shitting me?
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12 comments:
My sincerest condolences...
You will be blessed in another life for what you had to endure.
:)
That is funny...well, I'm sure it wasn't so much LAST NIGHT. You are a MUCH better woman than me, because I think when my kids reach the age of 13, I will make them clean up their own puke...especially if I'm watching tv! (teeheehee)
Christy
http://www.heavyonthecaffeine.com
The Mardi Gras beads had me laughing...hard. Kids these days man. It's those "Girl Gone Wild" infomercials. To someone who doesn't know any better, beads = tits. He's just stocking up that's all.
Honestly the contents of the underside of the mattress could have been a lot worse. The beads tough, hilarious.
Oh yuck, sorry for your night.
All pukiness aside, what is it with boys and socks?!? I never had 56 of them (and mismatched ones at that) on my floor growing up, yet my two little ones had ELEVEN odd ones in the back seat of my car alone. WTF?
Wow... so this is the stuff I get to continue to look forward to when mine get older. Fun.
All that stuff under the bed reminds me of my brother - he'd hide everything there - including dinner he didn't want to eat, but needed to hide from my parents. He was smart that way...
ARE YOU SHITTING ME!?
;-P
Hey there! Congrats! Nice Rack! Sorry about the puke :( Mom of 5 here .. I feel your pain.
I've always said, I can do boogers, fevers, ear infections, strep, etc. etc., but I cannot handle PUKE! So icky.
Why, oh why, can't kids make the toilet???????
He surely is shitting you. Sorry, sounds rough. But you made it sound funny - tee-hee!
Better woman than me. I make my 14 yo (just turned) clean up her own puke. Have since the day I had to clean up Ramen noodles from the ceiling of the bathroom when she was 10. Yuck. No more for me.
Of course, now I have 2 other little onbes to clean up after but hey... one down, two to go.
too funny...and I think that was a very appropiate response..one I would most certainly have given...you are a riot.
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