Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Public Service Annoucement-UPDATED

I like most things Canadian. Their health care, Kids in the Hall, Sarah McLaughlin, Ryan Reynolds, and, according to my husband, the most beautiful National Anthem (insert my eye roll and yawn here!)

Many amazingly talented and hot people are from Canada.










Can't think of much anything bad to say about them, eh? (well, that "eh" thing is a little annoying) , but one thing I don't like ... the Canada Goose- the unwelcome dropping ducks from the North!

We all know what happened in the New York Harbor and it is assumed these fecal infested fowl were the cause.



On Friday, we had a bit of a break in the weather and I decided to take a walk with my entourage... Me, Beebs, Lila, and Murphy, the dog. There is a quaint lake in our neighborhood that we love to walk around...



As soon as we get there, I am reminded of why I don't take walks in the winter...

yep, these little fuckers! They have taken over my lake. And their dung lined my walkway!

We made it about 2 steps before I was done dodging the wagon around goose turds and wanted to throw up because Murphy discovered a new snack. It isn't bad enough that these things honk by flock over our house 14 times a day like a scene out of The Birds? Now they gotta take away the little physical exercise I've attempted in a long time!


If you were ever curious where the phrase, shit like a goose comes from- wonder no more! These things weigh an average of 8lbs and poop up to 3 lbs a day! They poop , on an average, EVERY 12 MINUTES!!! During the winter, they can poop as much as 92 times a day. Can you tell I'm upset- I did actual research on these filthy creatures!!!


So Canada, I love you and your perfect little gun control, gay marriage, non-recession, hockey lovin' country, but can you throw us Americans a bone and take back you geese, eh?

UPDATE: I knew there was something fishy about these damn things- I just recieved this:

GOOSEAMA BIN LADEN

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27 comments:

Mom Taxi Julie said...

LMAO, my daughter HATES ducks, geese and anything else that flies. We have 3 man made little lakes here and I totally know what you mean about the goose poop!

Deb@Mommie Mayhem said...

Yuck !!Double Yuck !

♥georgie♥ said...

off with their heads....i need a new goose down comforter

Threeboys1mommy said...

I heart Michael Cera. Canadian geese are the worst, I'm partial to the French Grey Goose myself.

Patrice said...

YES! Ahh these stupid geese have taken over our campus! There are 100's of them.. I swear all they did over break was multiply.. a lot! And the poop... yes, it is ALL OVER campus! ahh I am right there with you hating them!

Under the Influence said...

I want to poop three lbs. a day. How does one get that gig?

Ronda's Rants said...

So funny....we live on a lake and everytime I let my Choc Lab out she drags me down the hill to attack ducks...she hates them like you hate geese!
OBTW...we also have Rhonda from A day in the life of Rhonda...she is pretty awesome too!

Real Live Lesbian said...

I hate them too, now. EW!

C said...

I know--it's gross!! I can't even believe so much poop can come from anything that size!

~Christy

momcat said...

I had two ducks once and I'm with you on the duck poo which is usually of the squirty variety. My daughter loved to eat their eggs though and would hunt the eggs down in the garden with determination.

Deb said...

they are everywhere here, as well. gross. oh and how hot is ryan gosling.

Gettysburg Mom said...

I recently learned that my brother who lives in Michigan is a federally certified destroyer of Canadian Goose nests. Apparently it's a class you can take it the spring. Think about how therapeutic that would be for you1

Dr Zibbs said...

I agree. There are tons of really funny people that come out of Canada.

Tiaras and Tantrums said...

oh those damn birds LOVE to come in on my yard in the spring and eat away my grass! I just sick my dog on them - the my dog eats all the goose poop - IT IS SO FRICKING DISGUSTING!

So Not Mom-a-licious said...

Aren't they mean too? I don't like birds in general. At all. In any capacity. Caged or free. I would have had to take the BB gun with me.

ciara said...

i <3 michael cera, too...he's sorta cute in a geeky, nerdy, musically talented sorta way hehe ducks are nasty/geese, too lol

Elaine A. said...

My Dad would call those guys lunch.

Heinous said...

Lol...I knew they were evil. Now we have proof. Call DHS!

Deb said...

Did you ever see The Office episode where Dwight brings the dead goose to the office? Hilarious.

Mc Allen said...

I'm sorry, and sending you big big hugs, but I lmbo. We have a pond here in our hood & they are all kver, I've never had any issues. You seem to have a rogue gaggle!! Hmm, spotlight and pellet gun, I'm just sayin... LA

Leon Basin said...

Cool post! Thank you!!!

Soxy Deb said...

Someone didn't have her coffee this morning.
Deep breaths Tena, deep breaths.

Jenni Jiggety said...

They are nasty and MEAN too! I hate them!

jill jill bo bill said...

My toilet says I am part goose. That is honkin' crazy.

Lee the MWOB Queen said...

WOW - I had no idea you guys had geese trouble from Canada - I guess they don't make their way down to us over here but believe you me we have plenty of shittin' bird type creatures cruising around our skies. Proof is all over my mini-van.

Under the Influence's comment has me cracking up...

:-)

Momo Fali said...

I once took the kids on a bike ride to the riverbank with a picnic lunch. I got my son out of the bikeseat, helmets and backpacks off, blanket down, and food out, and then a damn goose came and wrecked all our fun. I hate those damn things.

Tiffany said...

I had geese growing up (shocker huh?) and they DO shit alot. And they lay big eggs. That's all I have to say.