Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Your place for news!

Ok, I go to my computer this morning with not a CLUE of what to write- so consider this an apology in advance.

First, I use MSN as my home page. This morning it's freaking me out! There's a bunch of faces on the border! I don't know who these people are and they're distracting me! I'm not good with change- put it back the way it was!

So I click off of that really fast and go to my e-mail. In my inbox were the fool proof "Dear Beloved One" from Abola Poon, he's the securing bank official for the Hang Seng Bank in Tong and he's in a bit of a bind and needs my help. He assures me that there's "practically no risk"- REALLY MR. PONG? Well if you'd turn on the television (CNN, MSNBC, even FOX news would tell you)- you might realize you may not be wanting to be asking an American for assistance in banking right now, just sayin!

Then there's an e-mail from "Pheoebe"- looks somewhat legitimate titled "Apology Accepted by all my heart"- Ok, now maybe in hindsight, that could be broken English (prepositions can be confusing)- but my mind immediately thought it was someone in the blogosphere that I pissed off (yeah, there's been a few) and we were going to make up...

I opened it... this is the text:
that of a poem in it's self,know me better before fuck me ....

I am totally baffled! I don't know if this is a threat or an old boyfriend!

Then I go to my blog to start my pathetic excuse post for the day. I notice I have a few new comments from yesterday. WOO HOO! I got an award! Amy Bo Bamey has given me this:


It means "This blog invests and believes in proximity" .. which means something like if you like this blog, you should invest in (give money to) Tena because she could use the money and you should move close to her, because I hate all my neighbors, and apparently the feeling is mutual because in the last two weeks 4 people surrounding me have put their houses on the market! But if I liked my neighbors, I would probably never blog, so never mind. Blogging makes us close- that's better and sweet and not quite as much of a run-on sentence than my original!

Thank you so much, Amy, and because you are not scared off by my crudeness and profanity and you are using MY NEWS ADDICTION to keep you up to date (God help you!), I wanted to inform you a little more of the financial crisis going on in our country:


This cracked me up! It's not real, the financial downfall is real, but the man on man action was Howard Stern's doing.

post signature

20 comments:

Jen said...

I love how the newscasters tried to stay so professional. You know they wanted to totally crack up about the guys "consoling" each other. LOL!!

Eudae-mamia said...

"Pheobe" is probably just one of those old pervs you ticked off with your experimental blog titles. Now YOUR chickens are coming home to roost.

I would pay big money to go one day without hearing that phrase. It's right up there with "make no mistake" - enough already. I don't even eat eggs - keep the chickens out of my house. Oops, bailout approved, too late.

And that poor news guy - I can only imagine what the camera man was thinking - "this is so going on YouTube when I get home!"

Cheers!

Em

Dawn@Embracing the Ordinary Life said...

Just wanted to say thanks for stopping by my blog yesterday...100 things and being saucy was a lot of fun!! And the boy is doing just fine..he loves middle school

jill jill bo bill said...

Hey, I am wondering if Pheobe and the Matt guy who keeps sending me R.E.P.L.I.C.A. info on dildos are together. BTW, I have never ordered mine online. Plus, they don't sell them on Ebay. And Amybo beat me to you on the award.

The Mom said...

Congrats on the award sweetie! Oh and did I mention I often go by Phoebe...LOL!

Amy Amy Bo Bamey said...

OMG that video is so funny! See without your NEWS FLASH I would have missed that!

I keep getting the R.E.P.L.I.C.A. stuff too so annoying. I do not want to enlarge my penis any bigger than it already is too.

Congrats on the award, I am glad I gave ya something to blog about :)

Annie said...

Screw CNN, I'm coming here every day for whats up in the world. That was hilarious!

Rochelle said...

OMG, this post was hilarious. Thanks for the morning chuckle!

Jill said...

Congrats on your award! Yay for you.

CailinMarie said...

hello lady -
so in answer to your previous comments - yes I DO have a 'secret blog' and one of these days you'll bump into it ;-)
and
I FRIGGIN NEED HELP! I had to change my 'business blog' due to legal issues (see I have blog problems) and somebody took over the blog name when I released it and they are using it spam people, I'm so pissed! I spent months building up that readership and then had to let it go and now somebody is abusing it.
and making me look bad.
So the only thing I can think of is a rebuttal on my new business blog - but of course it doesn't have the same readership (I moved it 2 weeks ago) and so it isn't showing up in searches. Not so cool.
So... my thinking is that maybe I can get a flurry of comments and activity on the rebuttal post so that it will show up...
does that make anysense??? not likely - but please help? please? pretty please? with sugar and chocolates?

http://facepretty.blogspot.com/2008/09/spam-my-pretty-face-arbonne-and.html

georgie said...

I came here to get some man on man huggin errrrr 'therapy' instead you give me fake news LOL LOVED it!
Congrats chica

amelia bedelia said...

congrats on the award! You deserve it!

Queen-Size funny bone said...

doesn't all that bad news just depress you?

C said...

That's hysterical! Don't you love those emails? I dread the day one of my kids is reading over my shoulder or (God forbid) opens it and actually thinks that I solicit that kind of crap!

~Christy C

Deb said...

Tena,

You have a gift, really, you do. I didn't post today, because I can't think of anything to post about. You're inspiring me to try...

Congrats on the award!

KimandCo said...

Hey there! I just started reading your blog and wanted to let you know "there's someone out here" besides the readers you are already aware of! Loved the video.

HappyHourSue said...

Ha! Embarrassed to admit: 20 year Howard Stern Fan.

Congrats on your award!

Crazed Mom said...

You are so funny. Those liberians and folks from other countries really should look away from Americans for any moohlah.

Terri said...

my husband (non blogger or shall I say ANTI-blogger) was looking over my shoulder at the airport the other day when I clicked on the news bit and he cracked up! Just thought I'd share that with you. It was a good one.

Sabrae said...

OMG! That was too funny!! (the news cast that is)