Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Sleep is overrated

Murphy's second night in the house did not go well! He slept for 2 hours and cried for about 6. He had his first accident in our house, so in my stupor, I am disinfecting and sanitizing the house- IT WILL NOT SMELL LIKE A DOG!

Thanks Christy for being lazy and having writer's block making this 'meme week'- the same week as my new puppy arrival. I only wish I would have kept the "One Word" meme for today as I am having a hard time putting together full sentences. Here goes...

Accent: I don't think I have one. In St Louis, many say 'farty' instead of 'forty', pronounce the silent 'S' in Illinois, and excuse themselves to use the 'torlet' (toilet) and then 'warsh'(wash) their hands afterwards- don't ask- I don't get it! I don't know how I avoided it, since my parents are guilty of this butchering of the English language. I do, however, still say 'ya'll' and 'deouwn'- like- Ya'll, I'm goin' deouwn to the store. I went to college in Southern Missouri and it stuck.

Breakfast or no breakfast: I try- usually it is coffee and an egg white with flax seed oil on a whole grain English muffin- it grows on you.

Chore I don’t care for: Folding laundry- it's such a tedious job and not a big payoff!

Dog or Cat: one 3 lb crying, insomniac, sack of shit puppy.

Essential Electronics: Computer and cell phone

Favorite Cologne: For men- Drakaar Noir- as cliche as it is- I love it! Maybe one day I'll tell you a very funny story about my college days and Drakaar, but for now, I'd rather keep the ounce of dignity that I have remaining. Perfumes don't smell right on me.

Gold or Silver: I just had my gold wedding set dipped in white gold- aaah- the best of both worlds!

Handbag I carry most often: Knock- off Dolce Gabana zebra print clutch with fuscia trim- I'm so glad I tested out the fake first because it's way too small and I would have kicked myself for spending real jack on a purse that is always too full to close and my wallet hangs out of it upright- maybe I'll have to take a pic- it's pathetic!

Insomnia: Sometimes, yes. My wheels in my crazy head are always spinning and that keeps me up- oh yeah- and a yelping puppy!

Job Title: Chauffeur, Housekeeper, Financial Planner, Teacher, Accountant, Organizational Guru, Banker, Chef, Doctor, Therapist, super teeth cleaner and writer extraordinaire!

Kids: no thank you! I learned my lesson.

Living Arrangements: Husband,4 kids, myself, and now Murphy, the pup that doesn't sleep -live in a 4 bedroom, 3 bath story and a half house that has become too small even though it's twice the size of the house we lived in 3 years ago, outside of St Louis, MO.

Most Admirable Trait: I'm always right

Naughtiest Childhood Behavior: I sabotaged every relationship my mom had after she and my dad divorced. It's not that I wanted them back together, but she dated creeps- then when she found a decent one, I laid off- and he has been my step dad for 25 years-see, I am always right!

Overnight hospital stays: I had tubes put in my ears when I was 3 and had 4 kids. I've stayed overnight (9 days) for 2 of my kids' illnesses though, much much worse than anything happening to me!

Phobias: I'm a freak- a lot of things fall into this category. Crumbs or sand on my feet, public restrooms, mold, bad teeth.

Quote: 'You people have the morals of Guinea pigs'- Soapdish

Reason to smile: A clean smelling house, chocolate, 'quiet time' in my house, Christmas, fitting into skinny jeans

Siblings: One biological (7 years younger) sister; 3 step sisters- I consider them 'sisters' even though, technically they're not even 'step-sisters' anymore. My dad and my step mom of 21 years are divorced , but still date. Weird, I know!

Time I wake up: when I am woken up- not a morning person so I wake up when my kids or husband tell me that I am needed to cook, clean, drive- anytime between 7-9

Unusual Talent or Skill: I was trained as a singer my whole life, but don't have a great voice, but can keep pitch- I'm always on pitch. I can rock a mean Karaoke and I know almost every song ever made that isn't country!!!

Vegetable I Refuse to Eat: Broccoli- stinks

Worst Habit: I chew the inside of my mouth- I gnaw on it until it's raw- I think it's stress- I've done it forever!

X-rays: Not recently.

Yummy Stuff: chocolate, real Italian food.

Zoo Animal I Like Most: Any of the ones outside- that you can actually see- the houses stink!

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The Mom said...

Oh friend, i'm so sorry about the dog business. Cool Meme, i need to have another meme week when we go camping or something.

Caroline said...

How do you have the mind to write like that on such little sleep...great meme though!

Myssie said...

Cool post. I only recently found your blog and you have been cracking me up ever since! I was LMAO with the St. Louis lingo, I so know what you mean!

Dawn@Embracing the Ordinary Life said...

Oh will sleep again...remember the babies...

If you do NOT have a crate for the dog, get one...sometimes having it covered so they can't see helps them sleep...

Take a deserve it!!

C said...

We are totally getting drunk and doing karaoke if we ever go on that road trip! I'm a wiz at useless 80's songs & trivia, so we can rock some Duran Duran or something.

Jill said...

Sorry about the poochie - oh it's so not fun to be kept awake by an annoying dog.

Great meme - super fun answers. I too despise folding laundry - it is one of my lease favorite things to do. Not surprisingly, I am always right too. I continually tell my husband that - not that he listens. :)

Deb said...

Love the meme! The dog thing just brings back unpleasant memories from my days as a dog owner. I hope it gets better soon! I also vote for the crate. If the dog won't go in it, you should with a big bottle of wine and a pillow.

Anonymous said...

Fun meme.. your quote had me giggling holding my belly. I remember that.. that is old school!!!

JoggingInCircles.. :)

jaime said...

ok PLEASE fill me in on what a Meme is? i'm feeling really really stupid right about now. I get you were answering some questions and reminds me of those FWDS i would get from people all the time via email...but never heard of the word meme. help!

I did however love reading your answers! sucks about the dog, like having a newborn again eh? even the cleaning up shit part! lol

jaime said...

and i'm from Jersey and actually catch myself going all Soprano-like w/ the accent when I read my son his nighttime stories! "the little brown dawg was whhalkin to the pawk" lol!! scary, i know.

Keeper Of All Things said...

Love your blog
good luck with your dog
I kinda sound like Dr.Suess huh?

Anonymous said...

I love the Guinea pig quote, I can't wait to use it!

jill jill bo bill said...

Undoubtably, you ARE hiLARious, my little chicky!! So excited to get to know you. Oh, and I cuss- tired or not. It just makes things funnier in my twisted opinion.

Do the crate thing. 2 dogs, 1 was crated and never peed in house. Uncrated one-never house trained. Something about not peeing where they sleep...I don't know. I am NO dog whisperer. Do it so you can add it to your "Why I'm always Right" list which I am almost positive you have somewhere.

Terri said...

very interesting!! chewing on the inside of your mouth though? yuck. But I guess it's like chewings nails or some other nervous habit. :o)

Mrs4444 said...

I can add a strange pronunciation to your list: People who put a "t" on the end of "cousin," as in "He's my cousint." WTH is that??! I'd really like to know what that's all about!