Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Day 9

Alrighty, it is Day 9 of Operation Staycation and I'm sooo at the end of my rope. The house is a never ending mess of socks, crumbs, wet swimsuits, and men's size 12 shoes- EVERYWHERE! I am boycotting my normal cleaning schedule because I don't like to waste my time (that is reserved for blogging!)

If the mess coupled with my OCD wasn't enough... I'm quite certain my husband is 'PMS'ing!!! I don't have many men that stop in here, but the few that do- come on, the jig is up! Admit it, won't you? There is a week, once a month where you can't seem to satisfy a scratch, can eat your weight in chocolate chip cookies, and up is down and black is white- right?

We ladies get a total bum rap on the whole PMS thing. It's blamed for any "off" day. Sure, I ate a gallon of chocolate chocolate chip ice cream, called you a 'limp dicked stinky asshat' because you didn't make the bed even though you were the last one to get out of it, and cried in the shower because, well, who the hell knows why we cry then! Like I said- "off" day!

He was reading up on the owner's manual for the new car and discover the 'Jukebox' option (downloading your own songs into the computer of the car). I told him that I just prefer to listen to the variety of music that is offered on Satellite radio. Hold the Phone! You'd have thought I forced his hand at sacrificing his mother so I could make jewelry out of her appendages!

All of a sudden I am a boring, stupid, crazy bitch, my taste in music sucks, we shouldn't have even bought the car, and he wanted to go home immediately. Talk about 'on the rag!'- what a bitch! Is it that time of the month? Can I get you some Midol? I have an idea... GO BACK TO WORK!!!



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8 comments:

C said...

Okay, I'm sorry. I shouldn't be laughing...but I'm totally laughing. You poor thing...and you've still got quite few days of this stay-cation to go, don't you? I bet a 6 hour drive to drink Mojitos with me is looking pretty good--even if they end up making us sick!

~Christy

Deb said...

Amen! Thank you Tena, for speaking the truth. Going back to work might be in everyone's best interest at this point. Besides, how can you ogle hot boy while he's around?

If you have the stomach for another annoying husband story, come check out my blog.

Deb

The Mom said...

Ugh...i'm sorry, that sucks, what's up with him?

I agree with Deb...post some more pics of Hot Landscaper Boy and I am SURE he isn't raggin!

Dawn@Embracing the Ordinary Life said...

LOL...laughing at HIM NOT at you...I told you...there's a room if you want one...

Alice said...

I can't stand when my husband is home a lot. He just takes up too much space or something.

And I'm the same with shoes. I'm the shoe cubby enforcer and can get pretty Godzilla if I find shoes laying around the house.

Mrs4444 said...

Do you have to ride together? I'd lose my mind....

Jill said...

This is hilarious... sorry to be laughing. I take it you're so over the "quality" time together?

Clearly a vacation away from home will be much better... or will you be heading off by yourself in October?

Tiffany said...

Give hubs some ice cream and tell him to cry it out. LOL Yea we wanna see more pics of handyman boy.