Monday, May 19, 2008

lesson for the day

So, my recent fear of feeling and looking old (I am in a semi- mid life crisis and I hope my last post didn't scare too many off, take everything from me with a grain of salt, I'm a bit impulsive) took over my better judgement this weekend and I felt I needed a tan. I went to tanning salon for the first time in about 15 years!

I used to go when I was in high school and college ALL THE TIME! Then I had kids and my vanity became less important. Oh yeah, and everyone started realizing how horrible it is for you- I'm aware, just vain and stupid!

They have changed quite a bit since I used to go. They look like spaceships. There are like 10 different "levels" and it's become quite the investment! I decided that I just wanted to get a little color to get me over the winter into spring doldrums- it seems to have rained everyday here since spring started! I bought a package that is only for a week to try and achieve a "base" tan. They decided to put me in a level 4- due to my olive (green!) complexion.

So I get in the spaceship and have to lay on my back for 5 minutes and then switch to my stomach for 5 minutes. OK, back in the good ol' days, the crappy little bulbs weren't that strong and you could just lay the same way for the whole time (which was 30 minutes!!!). That's Ok, I'll follow the rules. I can see why... the bulbs on the top of the spaceship are HOT!!! So after 5 minutes I flip.

Now, remember, when I used to go to these, I was MUCH smaller! I weighed about 100 lbs and had an "A" cup, maybe "B" on a good day. Four kids, 15 years, 30lbs, and 2-3 cups larger, I am definitely a different person than I used to be.
It was soooo uncomfortable! I shifted my breasts about five different ways, trying to avoid wierd tan lines ( I don't know why I care- it's not like those puppies see the light of day!). I scooted them in, spread them out, pushed them up, layed them flat- and all of this contortioning in 5 minutes! All the while, my back side is ON FIRE!

Lesson for the day: Women larger than a "B" cup, should not lay in a tannig bed on their belly.

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Sue said...

LOL- I do the spray tan booths - I get the "pale spots" under the boobs - but my only other option is to hold them up, then I'll have handprints on my boobs. Never a good idea.

Ann said...

I'm going through a similar thing!
I've been obsessed with tanning lately!
And that's just not my thing. (What's going on with us?)
You made me laugh tonight.