Monday, February 2, 2009

Party's over- I'm on a diet!

The name of the game today is accountability. I'm taking responsibility for something has gotten utterly out of control, in an effort to make ammends and change my ways. It's official, I am a fat ass. Before this morning, I hadn't been to the gym in 2 months. I have been gluttonous and unapologetic in my eating and, I'm not going to lie, it was fun while it lasted.

So much fun in fact, that I ignored that my previously 'fat' jeans have become my 'skinny' jeans, my previously 'skinny' jeans have become a denim version of leg warmers that only go so far as my knees and have begun mocking me from the dusty part of the closet that never sees the light of day, and my elastic banded pants have become my evil accomplices and enablers.

If the standard donuts, ice cream and french fries screaming my name weren't enough enticement, certainly that chocolate chip cheesecake ball that my 100lb bitch sister set in front of my face yesterday, didn't stand a chance! I also learned that the bad economy makes you fat and obesity may spread like the common cold, buying my disorder some more time and bargaining power. Suffice it to say, I devoured that cheesecake ball, that we understandably deem, "the crack ball", like an addict on their last binge. Today was the day.

I'm done feeling the guilt of watching The Half Ton Man documentary while licking the chocolate frosting off of a paper plate and then, in all my paranoid glory, looking around the empty room and out the windows to make sure no one saw that. I'm done bad mouthing thin people just because I am totally jealous, lazy and have the will power of Charlie Sheen at the Playboy Mansion.

My long overdue trip to the gym today, followed by my incessant gulping of water and consequent trips to the bathroom are all laced with good intentions of fitting back into my clothes and being able to show more than just my forehead and eyes in a picture.

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33 comments:

Mom Taxi Julie said...

Good luck! I lasted 2 days on my last attempt. Do over next week (Sunday is my birthday so what's the point of starting now lol)

Me said...

You are adorable, and I can tell from your face that you are not overweight. I have a very very good way of eating, it's not a diet-it's how I eat, and if you foloow it, I promise you that you will shed excess weight if you have any, which I doubt you do. Anyway, if you want it email me

Dr Zibbs said...

The only thing I can tell from you pictures is that you look like a model.

Eudea-Mamia said...

Wow, you have gorgeous eyes!!

Turns out the bad economy makes you (me) a drunk as well. I'm having to spread out our "empties"
for the recycling guys, or they may call CPS on us.

Yum. Crack ball.

And I'm guessing your "fat" jeans are a size 6. I've seen you in a bathing suit.

The Daily Blonde said...

you know, curves are good. You're not a fat-ass...lol....and you're pretty darned cute in that picture.

Ronda's Rants said...

I understand...more than I would like to admit!
I am trying...I am showing up to my Pilates class that is run by a woman who has been trained in international torture!

Piece o' Coconut Cake said...

OK, I'm in but I have to tell you, I'm probably not going to be much help. I "supposedly" started my diet last week but, whatever...Either way, email Me and see what the hell she has to say that could possibly allow us to shed the *excess* weight and let me know! Right now, I would be doing cartwheels if I could fit into last year's "fat pants". Yup, it's that bad.

Heinous said...

If you're uncomfortable with how you look, go for it. You'll do well. Just stick with it.

Under the Influence said...

You look beautiful. Go ahead and eat the crack ball, just not the WHOLE thing. That's my version of a "diet."

Amy Amy Bo Bamey said...

I am right there with you! You do have GORGEOUS eyes BTW!

I need a Helluva lot more work than you do. You sadly look like my goal weight :) See it could be worse!

Dads(2) said...

Amen sister! I'm withya!

Dawn@Embracing the Ordinary Life said...

Killer eyes btw...maybe I should post my pictures like that...lol.

I'm on the road to less fat ass myself...it's a long hard road...filled with temptation...but I hope to be able to NOT hide myself when heading to the pool this summer...

Deb said...

and what beautiful eyes and forehead you do have, my dear.

maybe we can do this together. i have got to start exercising more regularly and my eating is out of control. i'd like to start today, but i am thinking i need one last pack of zebra cakes.

So Not Mom-a-licious said...

Sooo, that would be a 'No' to the nachos I take it? You gave me an idea when you "officially" declared yourself as a fat ass. We should take pictures of our asses, post those pics and then have a dieting contest. I wonder if that would be motivation enough for me. Althouhg, I would probably just let you win after you post your picture, but before I post mine! heehee j/k
I do wish you lots of strength and motivation.
Word verification = banses Meaning, I am banses from dieting.

Annie said...

Yeah....I'm joiing WW tomorrow.My 18 pound weight loss has made it back to a mere 11. I need to lose a good0 more!

Mary Moore said...

I haven't been in a much looooonnnger time than you. My excuse? I can't find my shoes. Yup.

Soxy Deb said...

But on the plus side, your forehead and eyes are so pretty.
At least you have that going for you.

Good luck!! I have faith, now that you've hit the rockiest of rock bottom, that you can do it! Accountability is key. Keep us posted.
My word verif is unclog. Why is that so funny to me?!

blueviolet said...

I wish you all the luck in the world! But your pretty little face doesn't look remotely plump.

Patrice said...

Good for you! I've been trying to do this lately too in attempt to look good in a bathing suit for Spring Break. I took a break this weekend lol but I'm back on it today!

jill jill bo bill said...

God, you are so cute! I am wishing you good luck. I need to climb the stairs and do the wii. I will touch base with you tomorrow if I don't pass out or die of a heart attack.

Melissa said...

You go girl! You can do this and it doesn't mean you have to give up all your favorite treats. It's all about moderation.

Best of luck!

Jenni Jiggety said...

You GO, Tena!

Paige said...

I am on the program too--although you could not tell by my Super Bowl behavior.

I am at 850 or 900 calories so far today, and have gone to aerobics and then to a spinning class.

I am pondering what piece of crap food I will eat for dinner that wont put me over 1200 calories

Lets keep each other on the path with this

Brittany said...

Come May, I am so going to do something active...until then, I am with you, only picture from the cheek bones up for me:)

Tiffany said...

Good luck! This coming from someone who bitched at her husband for eating the last donut. That bastard was calling my name all day at work. And I come home to NOTHING.

And you are so adorable. I don't give a shit what you weigh.

Jen said...

If you need an accountability partner, look no further than me. I'm totally jumping on the diet bandwagon. Tomorrow. I swear!

Jill said...

OMG - look how gorgeous your eyebrows and forehead are... even if I can't see the other 94% of you!

Tell me what diet plan you use... I have a wedding 7 weeks after munchkin #3 arrives and I MUST fit into this amazing dress that I bought last year and has been collecting dust in my closet.

Tiffany said...

I've got some denim leg warmers around here....

Terri said...

oh Tena you are too funny! Great post.

Dawn said...

You're the third person I've seen with this type of photo. I'm feeling like I've been left out of some secret photo challenge! LOL!

I need to join the 'lose the weight' club myself! It's just so hard!!

Honeybell said...

I'm not gonna tell you how great I think you look, 'cause you probably won't believe me, plus I don't see you naked (yet). :p

But, um, you look great.

A Buns Life said...

I'm guilty of eating ice cream while watching Biggest Loser....I hardly ever eat ice cream but I feel this urge that I can't get over until I eat some while watching it......it's horrible I know!

Threeboys1mommy said...

Oh my, your eyes are glorious! I'd skip the diet and put a magnified glass over them. Emphasize the positive you know ;-)