Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Life's Greatest Questions-Answered!

Thanks for your diagnosis. The verdict: I need more sex, iron, vitamins, meds, booze, and a crochet afghan. I may possibly be depressed (um yeah, I think that's a go!), could benefit from the bashing of disabled that are tone deaf (that's a give in), and may have Seasonal Affective Disorder- all very true! I think I may be sick, too. Remember how I mentioned I've been trying desperately to clear my throat and hacking up a lung in the process, but never clearing my throat fully of all of the phlegmy shit, well that's still a problem, but now my 8 year old is coughing so hard she throwing up. Nice! Just another damn reason I need to leave the comfort of my blanket cocoon! So maybe I really do have something! If I can't clear this lugie soon- this may really affect my future singing career- wha? You didn't know about my singing career?

I need to get rest, but here are the answers to the questions you sent...

Jen wants to know...
-Who is your favorite contestant this season so far? Any guesses on who you think will win?

My family RELIGIOUSLY, has watched American Idol since the first tryout episode of the first season! It is the one of the very FEW things that we agree on and do together as a family without whining, bitching, moaning, and throwing things- they do argue over butter-flavored or Kettle corn, but you pick your battles- I make both even though everyone knows butter flavor is the best!

This season is a little odd because the people that seemed good in Hollywood Week- haven't done great in semi-finals. There are always sleepers that they don't showcase during Hollywood Week- I think that's done on purpose- that come out and surprise you on stage.

Of course, I like Danny, he's a good singer and has a great story, but I can already tell that I'm going to get sick of hearing that his wife died! Is that cold? Who cares. Anyway, so far this year, I haven't been blown away by too many- I have liked Alison Iraheta and Anoop Dog. Lil Rounds was good, but I think her Mary J. Blige/Fantasia thing will bore me after about 2 weeks. Jorge also impressed me with his Elton John, Don't Let the Sun Go Down on Me, but let's be honest- there's only room for Marc Anthony and Enrique Iglesias, after that, they all start to sound the same . I think Adam is a good singer- he is a professional already, afterall! He is too theatrical, though, and his rendition of Satisfaction made me want to pull my fingernails off- I hated it!

I hope Ricky Braddy, Jesse Langseth, and Anoop do well and get the remaining wild card spots- I cannot, with good conscience, make a pick for a winner, yet. I take this shit seriously!

-Who is your favorite Idol contestant of all time? Elliott Yamin- his voice is like butta!

-Do you sing? If you were on Idol, what song would you perform? I do sing- not necessarily well, but on pitch. I took voice for many years, I just don't have the greatest 'tone' or 'soul' to my voice! I LOVE rocking a Karaoke, though, and I have thought about this before. I can rock out a Fiona Apple, Criminal or Shadow Boxer pretty well. My husband thinks it should be We Belong by Pat Benatar- I sang that at a seedy Karaoke bar one night and "the crowd stopped in its tracks"- I think that's an exaggeration, but oh well!

I HATE country music, but actually think my voice is better suited to sing country- I would have to consider Before He Cheats- that's a fun one (and I think may be one of 3 country songs I know!) If there was a Broadway Idol- I could kick ass with anything from Rent, Chicago, or Hairspray!

The Mom Jen wants to know...
What is the best quality you love about yourself?!

Growing up, you're told to be honest. We teach our kids to be honest. We're told that honesty is one of the most important things in a relationship. I am VERY honest. Too honest, in fact. My mom's teachings of truthfulness backfired on her and by the time I was about 15, she started preaching to me the quality of tact and how sometimes "it's better to say nothing at all." My husband often says "I wouldn't want to rob a bank with you." He's right- I would sooo turn him in. I can't lie!

So although I have been criticized for it, I'm proud of my honesty, dammit!

Three Boys One Mommy wants to know...
Why would you imply Anderson Cooper is gay when you know I love him and would leave my whole world for him!?! Why would you break my heart that way?

Because he is. Come on ladies, I love him, too, but we have to stop denying the facts and let the guy live his life in peace with his hot gay boyfriend!

Deb wants to know...
do you think michael was able to lose all the weight to save anyone from being eliminated last night? (Biggest Loser)

I want to say yes because you just gotta root for the kid, but I'm playing right into the teasing hands of NBC and they left with a clip of Bob saying "NO!" and looking disappointed, so I don't think that he did!

Just a Chic wants to know...
Where's the strangest place you've ever had sex?

It would be a toss up between an elevator in a hotel on New Year's Eve or in an old boyfriend's parent's bed- with a mirror on the ceiling! I swear to you, that boyfriend's dad bought me lingerie for Christmas- I'm pretty sure he had a camera set up in that room, too! ICK!

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Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

Too bad you don't live here, I've been wanting to go karaoking! We'd have a ball. The only thing is, I don't do country so they'd have to have something I could sing too.

Feel better soon!

Threeboys1mommy said...

We haven't watched AI all season this year, I was put off by the whole 4th judge thing... and Anderson is NOT gay la la la la la la *cover ears* I can't hear you! *stick out tongue*

Under the Influence said...

I think I will start calling my bluntness HONESTY. Will that work? I lack that tact thing sometimes, too, but I am SO much better than I used to be.

Deb said...

lord, you are hysterical. thank you for taking our questions seriously. i am thinking michael didn't lose enough, either.

and, oooooh girl, elliott is the man!

Eudae-Mamia said...

Oh my - the mirror on the ceiling? Eww on the lingerie. Eww.

Hope today finds you doing better!! It's so the March Uglies, love.

Buy yourself some flowers! Em

Mary Moore said...

Double ewww on the boyfriend's dad. That is just gross.

Amy Amy Bo Bamey said...

So is there a underground Tena sex tape that your ex boyfriends Dad is gonna try and blackmail you with now that you have this awesome blog!

Have you seen these pictures of Adam from AI....WARNING lots of glitter is involved

Anderson Cooper is HOT!

Amy Amy Bo Bamey said...

also not suitable if kids are around

Complicated Mama said...

My comments are as follows.. yes Im bulletting them. lol

- I believe I suffer from SAD to.. Mr. Complicated laughs-- but it is no laughing matter damn it!, eventhough the name does sound kinda funny. I need to move to a SUNNY HOT state- year round.

- I heart 3boys1mommy... but Anderson cooper is G-A-Y!... sorry honey, but did you ever see the clips where he rips apart the Living Lohan show? what straight guy would even watch that show?

- The ex boyfriend's dad sounds so creepy. lol.. I have a feeling that old relationship would make a great post in the future. haha

Mrs4444 said...

Wow. His parents' bed, huh? I suppose that would be a turn-on (the fear of getting caught.)

Our strangest spot was a study room at our college library; it had open ceilings. Getting kind of worked up just reminiscing, heehee.