Friday, March 6, 2009

Friday Fragments, Finally!

Better late than never, right? Here are my not- so- fragmented thoughts for the week... visit Mrs.4444 with your own fragments.

***Come back readers! I have heard crickets chirping on my blog all week! Was it something I said- or didn't say? Whatever it is, please know that my husband will soon be back to work. I am finally sitting in a quiet room without Dora in one ear and Rocky in the other! I can now resume my manic bitching and complaining... so on with the show...

***My husband goes back to work at 3PM this afternoon- I'm not sure if I will make it till then- pray for me.

*** He has been off since Monday. It has been a true test and because I like a challenge, I called Charter Cable today, my internet provider, because my e-mail has not been accepted as valid for my bank, Twitter, and Facebook messages. I think I deserve a medal for only using the words "piss", "fuck" and "shit" once and not going postal on their asses! I'm expecting a thank you card from them.

***My e-mail dilemma has been going on for about a month. It started with "invalid e-mail" messages from Twitter, then Facebook. I didn't do anything about it because I knew what a dork I would look like explaining to them that I'm not getting my DM (direct messages) sent to my e-mail from my Twitter and Facebook accounts. (I actually did call one time a couple of weeks ago and mentioned that I wasn't getting Twitter messages and she said, "mam, I don't know what that is." And I said, "It's a social network." Then she said, "you mean, like My Space?" And I was like, "NO! I'm NOT a loser! It's a, uh, networking tool for my, um, business." Then I realized I actually WAS a loser!)

Then, this morning, after gouging my eyes out from doing my online banking- I opened a message from my bank that said they, also, were unable to send messages to my e-mail account since it was invalid. Finally, a legit reason to contact the fuckheads at Charter, once again! The first 2 times- they wouldn't help me since I use my Charter e-mail through Outlook Express- what kind of crap is that???

Eventually, I pulled out the profanity, big guns and the "let me talk to you supervisor, DellaLishia!" The supervisors were actually helpful and didn't dismiss me and did some 'reconfiguring' of codes. Still. doesn't. work.

***Yesterday, I was driving to the mall, to try and get my head on straight, and my cell phone rings. I was pissed off because I was in the middle of listening to Howard Stern playing a clip of Margaret Cho talk about her sexual escapades because, apparently, she lost a bunch of weight and is a big bisexual ho-bag slut, now.

My husband: "You're not going to believe this one! The school just called."
Me: "OH GOD- what? "

The Principal says my son had been caught listening to his i-Pod in class and the teacher took it away and the songs had lude and explicit lyrics. I need to come up to school and pick up the confiscated i-Pod and we will discuss his consequences.

First, you will need to know that we moved to this school when my son was in 5th grade. Our last school, also a Catholic school, LOVED him! Never had any problems, got good grades, and the teachers and students all adored him.

The first week at our current school , he started getting "infractions". Silly stuff, if you ask me. He said "that sucks" when told they weren't going to get a recess, and basically just talking. At first, my primal instinct was to defend him since this was out of nowhere! After about 5 infractions and a detention, I was beside myself and didn't know what to think. I made arrangements to meet with the administration and the "5th grade team". One teacher, clearly, was not fond of my son and bashed him left and right. There was one teacher that couldn't fathom what problems he could be causing due to his good behavior in her class and one teacher that defended him because he was new to the school and procedures. I ended up breaking down crying during that meeting making a complete fool of myself and left with no closure, just more confusion!

I am very tough on my son. I expect a lot out of him. He does his chores, is good with his sisters (most of the time), and does his homework. He is no angel, but frankly, his biggest offense is talking back to me and sneaking corn chips up to his bedroom. He knows right from wrong and is a decent kid and a NORMAL 14 year old boy.

So, now in our 4th year here, my son has been labeled "the bad kid". He gets infractions weekly, some that the teachers admittedly give him by mistake because they blame him since he's near, but they never take them back! His grades and his confidence have suffered greatly at this school, he can't make a move without being reprimanded. I have been told by SEVERAL different people in this parish that these teachers 1.) have a problem with boys and 2.) 'mark' a few boys as scapegoats for every offense. I now believe it.

So, back to the i-Pod... I, personally, download ALL music onto his i-Pod- only the clean lyrics (the only cursing he needs to hear is from my fucking mouth, right?) We have one computer -and it's a desktop- in the family room- that I usually monopolize! If he needs it for a class project, I am only a few steps away in the main traffic area of our house.

My husband spoke to the Principal, not me, he is clueless does not know about the i-Pod or the computer and just assumed my son's guilt. I knew better and made a detour to the school to give them a taste of my mind. About explicit lyrics. While I'm listening to Margaret Cho talk about "ATM sex"- look it up- the irony is delicious!

I walk into the office with a swagger, pretty confident that I was right (I won't lie, there was a touch of worry and doubt, thinking he may have snuck to a computer and downloaded NWA, in which case, I would probably have cried- AGAIN!) I am buzzed in after another mom of a 'marked' boy leaves - IN TEARS- our boys have been the brunt of a lot of blame together and I really felt her pain!

I sit down at the Vice Principal's desk. He picks up the i-Pod and flips the VIDEO i-Pod towards me (my son just has a Nano)- cue gloating and HUGEMONGOUS SIGH OF RELIEF- "that is NOT my son's i-Pod!" He seemed rather confused why my son would be taking the blame for this. I explained to him our delinquent journey through this school (the VP is new to the school this year). How he has been reprimanded for "talking back" when declaring his innocence and "being a snitch " when denying part and pointing fingers at WHO actually did the offense, so now he just shuts up. I waged how the teacher PROBABLY didn't even ASK if it was his, just made an assumption (I was right). I told him he needs to look into the unfair treatment of some of the boys in the school. I was passionate and emotional and didn't curse once- I think another medal is in order!

I walked out of the office with my chest held high and could hear roar of cheering crowds in my head! When my son got home, I asked him how long he listened to this i-Pod? The boy had just leaned over and said "Listen to this" and put the ear bud in his ear and that's when the teacher caught my son! Discipline should not be played like a game of Hot Potato! My son is NOT a criminal- talk to him!

*** We St Louisans are beaming with pride today. Why, you ask? Because has declared our city #2 on the list of America's Unhappiest Cities!

Here's how we stacked up in the standings...
Overall rank: 2
Depression rank: 13
Suicide rank: 22
Crime (property and violent) rank: 1
Divorce rate rank: 18
Cloudy days: 164
Unemployment rate (December 2008): 8.2%

I was wondering what the hell was wrong with me all week? Thank you Business Week! Now, we're even MORE depressed!!!

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Just A Chic... said...

You go Mom! That rocks. I hate hate hate when idiotic teachers single a student out and just ride there ass for any little reason. And even more I hate when parents go along with it so as to avoid confrontation. Good for you for sticking up for your son! You literally made my day. I'm so damn proud of you.

Piece o' Coconut Cake said...

Good for you for taking care of business at his school! You RAWK!

Jen said...

Ok how did you not curse at the school idiots...I fear the day I have kids in school.

Also how the hell did you and your husband survive a week together...we are lucky to survive weekends at my house. Sunday evenings can get pretty dicey sometimes.

won said...


So other than all that, how are you?

Just kidding.

Thank God it's Friday...doubly so for you!

Soxy Deb said...

Not to gloss over all that happened with the school, I am glad you set them straight and hope things get better. But...
Did I read you right? Your city is ranked #1 in America for "crime (property and violent)? WTF!?

*scratching visit Tenakim off my to-do list*
next time your coming to the beach let me know. surely we can't be ranked worse then 5th or 6th.

Kim said...


One in kindergarten, one to go.

I do not look forward to this part of the school experience.

For now my biggest worry is the boyfriend my 5 year old has had since the beginning of school. What happened to boys being gross?


Jen said...

If I didn't know you lived in "Depression City USA" then I would have guessed that your son went to the school that I used to teach. The same kind of thing went down as soon as they got to 7th/8th grade. The teachers in this grade level were grumpy hags that should never be teaching. Good for you for sticking up for your son.

Ronda's Rants said...

Was Tampa, Florida on that list...because it is no longer fun here!
Sometimes teachers are lazy...that is all I am going to say!
I hope it gets better!

Annie said...

I'm just chillin' in OP.
Glad you got some digs in at school.

Under the Influence said...

Maybe you can sue the city of St. Louis for emotional and mental anguish and get rich!

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

Sure hope the VP apologized to your son as well as the teacher. Good for you for protecting your baby!!

Anonymous said...

TGIF and Happy VGNO!

Great fragments!

You should open a new email acct. Mine was the same way w/ my hotmail account and then I opened a yahoo account and it was fine.

Lizzie said...

my son is going through this same thing now. angel in the last school, we move and all of a sudden he;s the bad kid??? i'll be investigating this further!

came over for VGNO *cheers*

Jenni Jiggety said...

I heard that Margaret Cho thing on Stern! Wow, right?

I am glad you took care of things at that school. It is annoying that they never even bothered to ask for his side of the story! Sheesh!

pam said...

Dropping by from Ann's party. Wow, this was quite the story, how frustrated you must be!

Hope your weekend is good:)

Anonymous said...

We love listening to Howard Stern here too. He's so much more mellow no than he used to be, don't ya think?

Sorry about the incident with your son. That stinks!!!!

Happy VGNO!

Anonymous said...

Damn I was your son!!
If I did half of what I was blamed for I'd be a serial killer today!

Mary Moore said...

I'm so glad you took a stand. That unfair treatment just leads to loads of problems later in life...Good for you!

Mrs4444 said...

I think this is a record-long FF post, Tena, but I was happy to read every bit of it, because it was filled with fragmented goodness.

It is so tough for a kid to reinvent himself when teachers have him pegged as a troublemaker. It does seem odd that he would find himself near trouble "once a week," though. Is it really true? Well done on not freaking out on the VP. :)

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said...

Good job taking care of things! It really stinks when good kids get treated badly like that...he's lucky to have a great mom like you! ;) Happy VGNO!

KozyPal Team said...

I can totally relate to your child being labeled as the "problem kid". My 13 son is always coming home with marks on his conduct sheet. For stupid shit.
Glad things turned out ok.

Dawn@Embracing the Ordinary Life said...

Whew...I need a drink...just for the whole husband at home thing...

I can't stand teachers to bash kids...they should know better...if they don't enjoy their job than they need to get the f out!!

I'm glad you laid it out to the VP...hopefully that will put an end to it.

Brittany said...

What assholes! Way to go, mama!

Deb said...

holy cow. congrats on living in such a wonderland!

i am telling you, i don't want to sound like a conspiracy theorist, but i agree with you on the whole boy thing at school. it's really unfair.

sistersledgekws said...

good for you fellow sistersledge on giving those f'ers at the school hell. Your son will remember forever that his ma stuck up for him when the cards were down. My mom did it for me too!
I am 43 and remember it still!

Susan in the Psych Ward said...

Thank you so much for giving me another fabulous story of your kids school! And another reason to love mine even MORE!!! I know we've talked about our respective Catholic schools and I totally understand your frustrations! You go, girl... give 'em hell!!!

Mariah said...

This is screwed!! Good for you for sticking up for him, he'll remember it!!

Jill said...

Oh hello my long lost bloggie friend... I've been staying in touch via my reader, but so out of touch with commenting lately. Mea culpa!!

As for the iPod incident with your son. I'd have gone APE SHIT with the school. Good for you for sticking up for him - what a horrible situation for your son and for you!

Hope all is well on your end.

HappyHourSue said...

I've found with my stepson (16) that when there are some teachers that like him and a few that dont, there's some bias going on. A truly bad kid would be disliked across the board. Most of the time it's his association with troublemakers.

Go, mama bear!

Ashley said...

I'm reading this post before you post today due to your handy dandy link back!
Don't feel bad about ranked number one - we're apparently number 8, but ranked number 4 for depression. Outstanding!

Dorsey said...

Way to stand up for your son!! Unfortunately lately the infractions my son has been blamed for have actually been perpetrated by him. Ho hum...

Ann said...

Man! What a story.

(And guess what? I'm in Portland, OR. We're #1! We're #1. Take a Zoloft and pass the micro-brew! )