Wednesday, July 15, 2009

The dress

It's 1:35am and it's just me, my anxiety and the keyboard! Insomnia can kiss my ass.

I shopped today for clothes (a little black dress, to be precise)for BlogHer.

The first store I went into with high hopes, good intentions, and a smile. I was cocky- grabbing strappy dresses with little structure in single digit sizes. I had all 4 kids in tow and thought I could do it.

I learned otherwise.

I left crying and feeling bitch-slapped by time and gravity.

But there was still a job to be done.

So I put on my big girl pants (my Spanx), found a babysitter, and braved the fitting room alone- with me and my big girl sizes- gulp.

I decided that the first dress that zipped up pass my boobs and gave me the balls to walk out of the fitting room to look in the 3-way mirror was the victor.

It was the 12th dress I tried on!

I pulled a muscle trying to get the zipper up. However, my backfat only got pinched a little, so there's that.

I will need some assistance getting dressed that night- preferrably someone that can manhandle backfat and is a warrior with zippers, any takers?

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Anonymous said...

Gotta love a black dress!

Megryansmom said...

My black dress doesn't fit, I'm too broke to buy a new one, I'll be wearing sensible jeans and gym shoes. I was thinking of taking the train in to Chicago, I'll bring some wipes for your chin. I haven't ordered business cards yet, perhaps I could mooch 250 off of you and just scribble my name and url on the back?

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

I'm sure the black dress is just fine.

It's going to be so exciting that even if you don't get the dress zipped up, no one will probably notice.

Mrs4444 said...

OMG-You're probably crying about a size ten! (Unless your head really is 1/10 of your body size proportionally, I'm sure you have nothing to worry about.) And, WOW- your hair in that little widget there is gorgeous! Off to check it out!

Terri said...

I don't believe you for a second!!!

Lisa-licious said...

I will wrangle your back-fat if you will wrangle mine...I am in the same boat! Ugh!