Dear Elves...

Dear Keebler Elves,

I try to eat right. I do. I buy your cookies for my kids. I know, everyone says that, but I really do. If I'm being honest, yours are not my favorite cookies in the world- I can pass on them. Unfortunately, when I'm trying hard to eat right and your cookies are the only ounce of chocolate that I have in the house, there are bound to be moments of weakness. They're so small that I think I'll just sneak into my kitchen and get ONE cookie and solve my chocolate fix. Therein lies the problem.

First, I don't eat just one. They are very small. Do you have some kind of proportion scale you use in the baking tree? Is it made for elves? Because let me tell you, those cookies are too small for human consumption of just ONE!

Next, the packaging. Do elves have good hearing? Because your packaging is the loudest packaging in the universe and not conducive to sneaking a snack in the middle of the night. I give you EXHIBIT A:



Yes, I filmed that by hold a camera between my chin and my chest- I have mad skills!

Anyway. My point is... you should make your cookies slightly larger and look into a different kind of packaging- maybe something more recyclable- going green is all the rage these days.

Oh and another thing... which came first Grasshoppers or Girl Scout Thin Mints? 'Cuz if you guys had that idea first, you should really think about suing the asses off of those little girls- they taste exactly the same! But if the Girl Scouts were first, you should be ashamed of yourself, really, stealing from little girls? The package that I ate (that's right, I said package- but, seriously- they're small and minty, like a breath mint, so, really it's like eating a package of Breathsavers. Dipped in chocolate.)anyway... the package I ate yesterday was good and I didn't have to wait to be bothered by a little girl knocking on my door, then wait 3 months to get the over-priced box of cookies- so kudos- even if you did steal the idea.

Your friend,
Tena
P.S. vote for my BEWBS #09- Top three get prizes and I want to win some sexy undies- I've been teetering in 5th and 6th place. You can vote everyday until July 30!