Monday, April 27, 2009

Pissed

I am a FREAK about smells! If I don't like the way a food smells- I WON'T eat it! Cheese, broccoli, fish, and onions- they all stink- I don't eat them. I have a very sensitive nose and can smell ANYTHING! I am often seen walking through my house with my nose to the ground and on furniture to pinpoint the source of an unpleasant smell. My husband calls me the bloodhound.

Yucky smells make me crazy and I am currently on a wait list for the institution from today's excitement...

My 4 year old didn't make it to the bathroom after a nap (a very heavy nap that was nudged along by Benedryl since she couldn't breathe from allergies)... at least she made it to the bathroom tile before her bladder erupted. However, since I am a bit high strung, a raving lunatic passionate about my house not smelling like urine, my daughter was afraid to tell me about the said accident and took it upon herself to "clean it up". Dragging towels along the bathroom floor and hiding the pee saturated clothing in her toy box! I swear- my gag reflex is churning from just typing this and I'm having some post-traumatic syndrome symptoms! The best part? I didn't "discover" the accident and subsequent "cover-up" until my 8 year old came home from school and stepped into the bathroom and slipped and fell in it!

I have run the dishwasher 3 times- with toys, and am on my third load of laundry. I have ruined 2 pair of shorts with bleach splatter, ordered 3 kids to take showers, given a 4 year old 2 baths, and myself a shower. The water bill should be fun this month!

BUT I am still walking around like a bloodhound! I can still smell it! I permanently smell urine running through my scent canal, I'm 95% sure it's in my mind, but it is driving me mad. Couldn't I just get the swine flu?


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21 comments:

Debz said...

And that is certainly one of the worst smells there is.
My oldest, when he was 4ish, had a habit of sleep-walking that was more like sleep-peeing. He only walked to wherever he happened to pick for that nights peepee party and then pee and go back to bed. Since he was sleeping, he never knew and we spent many, many, many days walking around the house trying to find where the offensive smell was coming from this time.

Bad flashbacks. Real bad flashbacks.
I picked the wrong day to quit drinking.

Anonymous said...

Lol. I'm laughing at the post title. I don't have a particular reason why, other then that along with this post made me laugh.
I have a hyper-sensitive olfactory zone as well. It's like a curse isn't it?

Mary@Holy Mackerel said...

Yeah, pee's not such a great smell...hope by tomorrow, your scent canal's cleared.

Unknown said...

Be careful of what you ask for....! I can't stand urine either and my 12 yr old dog is having issues....it is driving me absolutely insane. I am so paranoid that my house smells like piss, even though my friends say it doesn't, I swear I can still smell it. Perfect excuse to get more hardwood floor I suppose....

jill jill bo bill said...

Honey baby, swine stink. You would die just from that. Just do the nurse trick- Put some mentholadum on your lips and that will be all you smell. Plus your lips will be silky smooth.

Jenn@ The Crazies said...

Ewww... urine is up there on my list of yucky smells.. along w/ cheese... especially sprinkly stinky parm cheese... that looks like sawdust!!

Dr Zibbs said...

Oh I hear you with the smells.

Kim said...

I can smell it all the way at my house. But my olfactory senses run on overdrive 100% of the time, too.

Ash said...

Baking soda and lots and lots of candles.

I guess it could have been puke. Puke is way worse.

LOVE the title.

Annie said...

That was very kind of her. Good job, Beebs!

Anonymous said...

LMBO! Big time!

I, too, have an extra sensitive nose. Drives my hubs bonkers!

Deb said...

i'm with em... puke is worse. and at least she's not a cat. cat urine is worse.

try sniffing some coffee beans. or liquid paper.

Amy Amy Bo Bamey said...

Oh Yeah...throw up is way worse but pee is 2nd in line.

I am getting ready to rip up the carpet upstairs and replace it because my son's room has a faint smell of pee still from when he had a accident. Can't take it no more.

Anonymous said...

Ha!
Sounds like the bride to me!!
Sniffing around.

TFF

Deb said...

Wow. I would be pissed.

Ha! Get it?

Jenni said...

Oh...pee smell! ICK!!!

I hope it leaves your nose SOON!

Terri said...

don't you love how kids try to be helpful and clean up but only makes things 10x worse!?!?! Bet the 8 yr old was pleased-as-punch to find out what they'd slipped in!

Colleen - Mommy Always Wins said...

Ooh - what a doozie!
Maybe you can self-medicate your "bloodhound" condition with some wine. Its 5:00 somewhere, right?

Unknown said...

I just like the title of your post. It's awesome.

:-)

So sorry about all of those smells. We are just concluding a week of a stomach bug in this house and the barf/diarrhea combo that has been spewed all over this place is enough to make me want to somehow be able to tent my entire home and clean the f##k out of it!

Anonymous said...

ok ok, deep breathing, calm down. first of all, you need to find something that you LOVE the smell of, put it up to your nose and inhale deeply 4 of 5 times. that will get a new smell inside of your nose and voila...you're cured of the icky smell syndrome! good luck!

tiarastantrums said...

oh man - you are like me and after having babies - my sense of smell is heightened further! can't take it!